I hope you had a six-pack handy while watching relevant names like Jamaal Charles, AJ Green, Knowshon Moreno, DeSean Jackson and RGIII all going down with (what look to be) significant injuries.
I don’t recall seeing such consistently low fantasy scores—across the board—in a very long time. In one of my competitive money leagues, the total points scored by BOTH TEAMS was 150. Three teams eclipsed that mark in Week 1. Yes, individually.
Stats That Make You Go Hmmmm – The following head-scratchers are based on PPR scoring.
- QB: Geno Smith, Derek Carr and Kirk Cousins all finished with more fantasy points than Drew Brees, Matthew Stafford and Matt Ryan. Yeah, next beverage on me if you saw that coming.
- RB: Silas Redd, third on the Redskins depth chart, finished with more fantasy points than Matt Forte or Eddie Lacy (as well as the injured guys – Charles, Knowshon and Ryan Mathews).
- RB Part Deux: Three of the top five fantasy RBs this week were not in the Top 30 RBs picked in fantasy drafts this year: Darren Sproles, Knile Davis and Ahmad Bradshaw.
- WR: Sammy Watkins (25.70) had as many fantasy points as Percy Harvin (10), Cordarrelle Patterson (9.60) and Kendall Wright (6.10) combined.
- WR Part Deux: Parity. Good stuff from Jon Kelly.
- TE: Of the Top 5 scoring TEs this week (Antonio Gates, Jimmy Graham, Delanie Walker, Niles Paul, Owen Daniels), only Graham finished in the Top 13 TEs drafted this year.
- What’s In a Name? A guy named Orleans Darkwa, fourth string on Miami’s RB chart, finished ahead of Reggie Bush, Shane Vereen, Shonn Greene, Toby Gerhart and Chris Johnson in PPR leagues. I did draft him in my ‘Florida-Teams-Only Backup RB’ league. Unfortunately, I had him sitting on my bench behind Jordan Todman and Jorvorskie Lane.
- Back To the Future: Big production from Antonio Gates, Darren Sproles, Ahmad Bradshaw and James Jones. What year is this anyway .. 2012? During that season, each of these seasoned vets finished Top 20 in fantasy scoring at their positions
- Not So Instant Replay: Did I miss something? I thought the NFL implemented instant replay on all scoring plays? How was Percy Harvin’s 51-yard touchdown run against the Chargers NOT overturned? See for yourself here. Fortunately for the NFL, this blown call didn’t affect the outcome of a Chargers victory. The same cannot be said for me losing to @FFRittle in a money league; I lost by 4 points. That play alone gave him 11 points. I’ve officially submitted a grievance to the NFL, my league commissioner and to my local Congressman. And worst of all, now I have to wear one of Rittle’s infamous neckties this coming Sunday.
- You’re My Favorite Mom: James Jones may well be the best receiver in Oakland. Really. He put up a 9/112/1 line and 24 fantasy points against the Texans Sunday. I think one of my favorite lines of the weekend, though, goes to @ErinSharoni on the CBSSports.com Fantasy Football Today Podcast, when she said that being the best WR in Oakland is like “telling your mother, ‘You’re my favorite mom.’” Love. It.
- Someone Forgot the Crazy Glue in Oakland: Speaking of James Jones, I don’t think I’ve ever seen one player fumble twice on one play. Just Raiders being Raiders, I suppose.
- Good Lordy, It’s Jordy: Quick! Who tops the fantasy points leader board after two weeks? Wait for it … wait for it. In full PPR scoring leagues, one Jordy Nelson has 53.20 points on 18 catches, 292 yards and a touch. To quote Puddy, Elaine’s boyfriend on Seinfeld (but when he’s not playing some ancient animated warrior in Mr. Peabody & Sherman), “I did NOT see that coming!”
- I’ve Fallen And Can’t Get Up: After Week 2, the NFL announced that each team could add another roster spot … not for players, but for medical staffers. Personally, I have Charles, Knowshon, Cameron and AJ Green. On the same team. You’ll never believe who didn’t win his matchup this week! I’m thinking one could field a pretty darn good fantasy team—on paper—of guys who are hurt/out/injured/suspended. RGIII or Carson Palmer at QB. Charles, Knowshon, Mathews and Mark Ingram as backs. AJ Green, DeSean, and Alshon at receiver. And the Jordans (Cameron and Reed) at tight end. It’s only Week 2. Just keepin’ in real.
Shhhh … Let’s Keep It Our Little Secret – I can admit it. I was wrong.
- Yes, I said Tony Romo and Tom Brady would show up and put up numbers. Um, well, you see, it’s like this. I was right about the Cowboys and Patriots showing up. That counts for something, right?
- I sat Brandon Marshall. I’ll give myself a partial mulligan here; who knew about the severity of that ankle injury? Dude came to PLAY. I can assure you I won’t be Forgetting Brandon Marshall now.
- Stevan, Stevan, Stevan. When Ridley comes to play, doesn’t fumble, gets the carries, runs hard, doesn’t fumble, Hoodie calls his number, breaks tackles, doesn’t fumble and scores touchdowns … … he’s pretty good. Oh, did I mention he needs to not fumble?
My Arm CAN Reach Around To Pat Myself On The Back – I’m also not very humble. I’m the MAN!
- I picked Delanie Walker to have a big game. A 10/142/1 line isn’t bad, especially when the rest of the entire Titans roster stunk up the joint.
- I told everyone that listened—all 7 of you, thank you for listening—to pick up Bobby Rainey. Did my crystal ball tell me that Dougie Fresh Martin would not even suit up? Hey, I’m no David Blaine.
- When Dez Bryant puts his pacifier away, he’s a beast. I said he’d come back strong and, well, even when it’s the Titans D, this is a pretty good line: 10/103/1.
So, remember. Lick your wounds, dust yourself off and don’t look in the rearview. Unless you won. Then gloat as loud as you can. Until this time next week, when we do it all over again.
Meantime … stay strong, show kindness and NO RAGRETS.
Jay Marks is the Fantasy Football Lead for The Scoop. Follow him on Twitter at @FFHottieAsst.